Thank You

As many of you are aware, Eric passed away early February 5. His funeral will be this Saturday, and his obituary runs today and tomorrow in the Salt Lake Tribune and the Deseret News.

Eric had a good night Monday night, waking up a lot but then going right back to sleep.  I knew his body was slowly shutting down, but we didn't know how long it would take.  We had been told by his doctor and by hospice that he would be more comfortable if he had a blood transfusion because his body wouldn't be in so much distress.  Everyone assumed that he still had a week or two to live.

We were at LDS hospital at 8:00 a.m. Tuesday morning and Eric received two units of blood.  Our nurse was so kind because it was obvious to her that Eric dying, but she also said that the blood would give him a positive boost.  And it did.  Throughout the day Eric had spurts of energy so that he could walk and carry on good conversations.

Our son Gregory flew in to SLC Tuesday morning and our son Michael picked him up at the airport and brought him to LDS.  They visited with us there and it was a tremendous comfort.  Gregory helped me bring Eric him and get him settled in.  Eric sipped water, slept and visited with us throughout the day.  Various family and friends came by or called, and Eric loved hearing from them.  As people sent messages through various social mediums I passed them on to Eric.

By late afternoon Eric was telling people that he was going to pass away that night.  With various others assisting, Gregory gave Eric a blessing in the afternoon and our son Stephen gave him a blessing in the evening.  Both blessings reassured Eric that he was loved and would be missed, but that it was time for him to leave this earth life if that was his choice.  Eric was able to say goodbye to Brent, Christina, and Matthew, our children who couldn't make it to Utah in time.  He was also able to say goodbye to his father.

In the evening a few people gave Eric messages to pass on to loved ones on the other side.  These messages really perked Eric up.  He has hated feeling useless (his feeling, not mine.  I have loved every minute that I have spent with him during this process.)  Now he had a mission--delivering messages for friends and family.

We went to bed as normal, with Eric visiting with me several times.  I was worried that Eric would feel disappointed waking up beside me in the morning.  He was still too coherent and strong to die, and I know it is not easy to pass away even when we desire to do so.

Just before midnight Eric asked me to walk him to the bathroom.  He walked there all by himself.  After awhile we started to walk back to the bedroom.  Eric started to tip forward so I grabbed him, thinking he was light headed or weak.  But then he stiffened and I felt or heard something snap, and I knew he was passing away.  I called for Gregory, who came running, and we gently lowered Eric to the ground and put a pillow under his head.  We told him we loved him, to please go home to his loving Heavenly Father, and Gregory sang "I Am A Child Of God" to him.  Within moments Eric took his last breath.  It was all very fast, which is just what Eric wanted. 

I called our children to let them know and our son Michael came to be with us.  We covered Eric with a blanket and Gregory, Michael and I sat by him in the hallway and reminisced.  When you are telling stories about Eric, you know that laughter will soon follow.  We had a wonderful time with him.

Numerous people have expressed regret that they didn't have time to say goodbye to Eric.  He knew that you loved him, and he knows it even better now that he is in a better place.  We have been overwhelmed with the love and support we have received for the last nine months.  Family, friends, and medical providers have all lightened our burden and lifted us up.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Several people have asked Eric what he has learned through all this.  His advice would be: 

Take a hike.  Literally.  Go for a walk and admire this beautiful world that God has created for us.  Stretch your legs and get your heart pumping.  Appreciate the beauty and function of the human body, even with its limitations.

Read a book.  There is so much to learn in this life.  Even as Eric's body was shutting down he continued to read, mark important passages, and share them with me.  Read with a child.  Ask them questions and answer their questions. 

Lend a hand.    People have asked how Eric was so inspired as to know when they needed to be noticed.  Easy answer.  We all have burdens that we carry, and Eric and I have yet to find someone that doesn't appreciate a little attention.  There were many times he was truly inspired, and many times when he just tried to be a friend.

Say a prayer.  Each one of us is a child of God, but some of us have a harder time accepting that.  Don't be proud, pour your heart out in prayer.  God loves you and will bring you peace.  I know this is true.